Sorry spots 639
lamenting how bad leadership infects the whole body politic and more (HM May
2001)
on the presidential election 409 a view on america before having visited that
country that is like.. "Packaging. Comfy. Must feel like being in a McDonalds
bag." (HM Dec 2001)
state of the day 475 ruminating on the state of the human world some months
after 9/11 (HM Jan 2002)
War and Sickness 1047 on the human condition during the time of George Bush,
and more lovers of war and sicknesses (HM Apr 2002)
the river flow 235 of static understandings versus the reality of flow, or
the flowing reality (HM Jul 2006)
Maturity 789 Looking at three cases - a musician friend's breakdown, humankind's
development and South Africa's political transformation - through the lens
of childhood, adolescence and maturity (HM Sept 2006)
human maturity 472 .. or the lack of it. the reality of the limitations of
our existence on earth - and the way she knows us, and her power to draw us
back down (HM May 2007)
global agenda for humanity's maturity 536 from the premise that as a still
growing species, we find ourselves in the adolescent phase of our story on
planet earth. maturity still lies ahead of us. how would an agenda look like
to advance purposefully towards this? (HM Sep 2008)
a global shift 558 in response to Barack Obama's acceptance speech after his
re-election - identifying two aspects of a global shift without anticipating
the significant backlash to come (HM Jan 2012)
Mandela died 424 on the death of Mandela, the significance of his character
and how we can be inspired by it (HM Jan 2014)
we are a nervous bunch 721 about humanity being nervous and then doing things
that compounds the condition (HM Jul 2014)
airport hub 1621 reflections on the state of humanity, seen from the perspective
of an airport hub (HM March 2017)
weltshmerzerig 326 Uiteindelijk kwam alles, in zijn falen, een soort van heel
erg goed. Maar dat soort kleffe eindes lazen wij - weltshmerzerig - toen nooit.
(JD May 2020)
the false split between The Left and The Right 3245 How to find common ground
between Conservatives and Liberals who treat each other like aliens. and yes,
why, with the rise of extremism and the retreat of religion, this is a necessary
thing to do. (HM Aug 2020)
Dear Mr President 485 Joke has been unable to visit her family and home country
since the lockdown. The associated longings is a sacrifice wilingly made.
But business people, those with the money, they can fly around freely. How
come, mr President? (JD Oct 2020)
the tribe of red and blue 1757 in conversation with a nation extremely polarized
and incapacitated by that. is healing the rift possible at all? (HM Oct 2020)
The Meaning of the Pandemic 4291 There is a lot of noise in a world with an
array of approaches to the COVID-19 reality. Who is right and who is wrong?
Besides the effort to get past this, is there any shared meaning that we can
derive from this historical disruption? (HM Feb 2021)
a tale of two countries 3371 both South Africa and America has inherent qualities
to gives them global significance. but this specialness cannot be taken for
granted and comes with huge responsibility (HM Jun 2021)
Political Leadership 4383 This essay argues for the centrality of politics
in all spheres of life, that is a business of the heart, not the mind, and
that we have not yet matured in the way we do politics - the main reason why
we distrust it so much. (HM Jul 2021)
happiness is 1628 well, yes, what is it? it happens, you know when it does.
it is many things, is paradoxical, it slips like water (HM Feb 2022)
a letter to mr Biden 1066 responding to the crisis around the candidacy of
81 year old Joe Biden, after his first "disastrous" debate against
Donald Trump. (HM Jul 2024)
they travelled
A4 hand the long story of how they (which is us) became something so very
different (HM Jan 2002)
home is africa 23 home is Africa.. (HM Jun 2002)
maybe 50 maybe we should just accept we humans have failed (HM Aug 2002)
drunk 67 the human condition (HM May 2007)
dangling feet 151 a poem written for the production "Foot Fantasia",
on the way humanity started drifting, disconnected from the earth (HM Oct
2007)
township feet 173 wondering whether there is something to township life that
is more desirable than the moneyed life that so many aspire to (HM Oct 2007)
late afternoon 91 poem written while stuck in traffic near a construction
site (HM Mar 2008)
perhaps not the A4 hand how memory fails us, but we still walk until the end,
even within the space of a short poem (HM May 2008)
dictator A4 hand i visited Syria in 2009, before the brutal civil war started.
i took a photo of Assad's face on one of the posters and images of him, all
over the country. and then, reflecting back, i wrote a poem (HM Apr 2009)
africa, being home 338 a European discovering Africa as humanity's embracing
mother during a first visit (JD Oct 2012)
as long as 418 a poetic interpretation of what hope means to me (JD, Sept
2016)
lullaby for someone who worries too much 107 A playful and short lullaby,
rich of images. (JD, Sept 2016)
I am. That is a fact 1785 Inspired by an Ubuntu saying of connectedness mixed
with my own sense of confusion. Written with jazz music in mind. (JD Jul 2019)
diminish 134 perhaps it is not humans who alone go forward while all the rest
are suffering. perhaps we all are slowly going down (HM Oct 2019)
cellular 510 what a tiny little virus managed to achieve, and to say to us
(HM Apr 2020)
the butterflies continue 309 during the times of the coronavirus, there should
be crying, and hope, as the butterflies continue (JD Apr 2020)
a form of us 160 a dreamy ode to ephemeral happiness (JD Apr 2020)
world-wearily 354 of the days of our youth when ideals were high and achievements
low (JD May 2020)
Hitler 344 it's rather easy to distance oneself from Hitler, the monster.
but he could be very kind. and what we still do, can be pretty monstrous (HM
more than a feeling 86 after a walk with Joke and Mira, a poem about happiness
(HM Jan 2021)
planetary talk 344 a planet close to the sun reflects on the priviledge it
has to be so stable. it never wants to drift of into the zone where earth
is orbiting, opening itself up to the danger of life.. (Jan 2022)
still life 421 the givens of a normal touring day (HM Feb 2022)
grandparents 99 a few appreciative thoughts on those in the twilight zone
(HM Jun 2022)
performing to the handicapped 142 once a year, an organization in the Netherlands
arranges for me to play to several houses where handicapped people are being
taken care of. an expression of what this has come to mean to me (HM Jul 2022)
a slight tickery tick 139 still life of a happy moment (HM Aug 2022)
progress 584 that the earth is not flat does not mean there are no limits
(HM Jun 2013)
my lewe 236 'n
hoopvolle oorsig van my lewe op 'n stadium waar dit nog moeilik gegaan het
(HM Dec 2003)
mensereis 195 die mensheidsverhaal as reis - waarheen? (HM Nov 2006)
funny-ie A4 hand "wanneer dit rol en lÛ / en nonsens sÛ /
niks meer as 'n rymelary / 'n deurmekaar gevry.." (HM Jul 2009)
onder 'n oorhangende rots 79 uiteindelik die land, die stof, wat 'n Europese
identiteit verskuif tot 'n nuwe self-benaming (HM Okt 2020)
op die rand 311 hiermee wil ek maar net se dat ek staan op die rand as dit
kom by verkiesings and braaivleispartye. en dis nie altyd lekker nie. (HM
Nov 2021)
julle sit 220 'n gedig oor ou mense. ou mense wat in 'n ouetehuis sit en luister
na my tjellospel (HM Okt 2022)
04
GEDICHTEN
zolang 402 Een
poÙtische en beeldrijke opsomming van wat hoop in deze tijden voor
mij betekent. ((JD, Jan 2017)
Ik ben. Dat is een feit. 1505 Ge´nspireerd door een Ubuntu gezegde over
verbondenheid, gemengd met mijn eigen gevoel van verwarring. Geschreven met
jazz muziek in gedachten. (JD Jul 2019)
een vorm van ons 145 een dromerig ode aan vluchtig geluk (JD Apr 2020)
05 PROSE
Kosal
2760 The remarkable story of a Cambodian child during the dastardly reign
of Pol Pot, as related to me personally. (HM Oct 2021)
the
story of mice 873 inspired by stories I improvise to Mira, this story
improvisation takes mice to the furtherest end of life on this planet (HM
Feb 2023)
06 SERIES
SITRAP
2019
SITRAP 191019 and soon the steely wings 932 sitting in Charles de Gaule
Airport feeling trapped, finding a way to enact change (HM Oct 2019)
SITRAP 191030 a room 191 writing from where we now stay in Regina, Canada
(HM Oct 2019)
SITRAP 191101 Performance in Edmonton 1237 the inner story of taking a leap
to perform for the first time in a foreign city where no one knows.. (HM Oct
2019)
SITRAP 191110 seductive city A4 hand reflecting on the seductive power of
a city after having driven through the heart of Toronto (HM Nov 2019)
SITRAP 191201 oh my beeeep! 1455 going off on the way unnecessary technology
makes us all the weaker (HM Dec 2019)
SITRAP 191208 many and much will die 1192 of the handicapped, miracles, Jacques
Brel, roadside scams and the terrible decades to come (HM Dec 2019)
SITRAP
2020
SITRAP 200126 divine bubble 1472 reporting from Sharjah in the UAE, introducing
the Bubbleman and the rot behind the shine (HM Jan 2020)
SITRAP 200212 Pretoria and the magic milk of land 860 writing at night while
Mira is breastfeeding and we sit on top of Pretoria, feeling the magic of
the city, reflecting on its Apartheid past and my childhood memories of it
(HM Feb 2020)
SITRAP 200319 brace for change 1440 sitting at home during the first days
of the coronavirus my toughts run from a dying tree and horse to what this
little organism is doing to humanity, how the past is called in to shape the
future.. (HM March 2020)
SITRAP 200424 How the West Got Lost 1887 from being in lockdown to the fall
of the Roman Empire and its modern day mirror, the US of A; the flawed genius
of the West, and how i am a part of it; the poverty of American individualism
and the need for world government.. (HM Apr 2020)
SITRAP 200517 of clocks, garden scissors and ... 1758 on the SITRAP as a throwback
to army days, but actually about working the environment on the property of
Eagle's Ridge, finding a balance between gardening and going wild: recreating
a bit of holiness, a timeless physical space.. (HM May 2020)
SITRAP 200604 murder and madness in artists' lives 2108 two movies moved me
to reflect on the lure and dangers of taking the freedom to be an artist -
how murder and madness lurk around many a corner. but there is a way through..
(HM Jun 2020)
SITRAP 200706 chicken feathers 3642 fear can be self-destructive. but the
destruction does not come from that which is feared.. (about this, about QAnon,
Bible reading and an imaginary man who is climbing a mountain) (HM Jul 2020)
SITRAP 200811 ocean's pain 1153 memories of drowning (almost). the way the
ocean changes the sky. and the party of black gold is now 200 years old. if
i am a father.. (HM Aug 2020)
SITRAP 200926 of nothing and the open slate.. 1233 of writing a book about
nothing and what it means for life and death and the possible re-election
of Donald Trump (HM Sep 2020)
SITRAP 201005 the earth is flat, or.. 1241 another improvised roll that starts
with the feeling of being in a swirl, then finds traction around the flatness
of the earth and the anxiety brought about by scientific illumination. how
poetry is born from the body.. (HM Oct 2020)
SITRAP 201204 we, the arsonists 1720 on this day i made fires, fired up a
Zoom meeting and saw how the Romanovs went up in flames. which lead to thoughts
of how fire defines us and making a pot of vegetable soup (HM Dec 2020)
SITRAP
2021
SITRAP 210121 Trump, car crashes and boredom 3477 after both Biden and
Trump's speeches i was reminded of running after car crashes as a child. why
do i still watch car crashes on YouTube? why am i a bit sad that Trump is
leaving? and yet i cried as i welcomed boredom (HM Jan 2021)
SITRAP 210307 where there is death there is life 2422 finding myself in the
tropics i ponder the supply and demand of life itself, the feng-shui of performance
and the disembodied niceness of fruit juice (HM Mar 2021)
SITRAP 210601 a power failure, words, pain 1633 it is a cold and dark night
and i warm myself with words, waiting for the power to be restored. words
like sounds like colours like Kandinsky. dreams and the origins of language.
and everything's a story (HM Jun 2021)
SITRAP 210912 of Beethoven, Kundera.. 1924 why is it that '50s jazz so often
plays in restaurants? what is the power of jazz? and what does it have to
do with soccer, or Kundera? and how did Kundera came to belittle Beethoven?
and how does it all go down with a blueberry smoothie? (HM Sep 2021)
SITRAP 211126 about a well paid gig 2006 an old opera house being run by Africans
and what i experienced performing to a mostly African audience - both a sense
of loss and a sense of belonging (HM Nov 2021)
SITRAP
2022
SITRAP 220306 the hopeful pointlessness of life 2413 the difficulty of
writing about beliefs, the pointed pointlessness of life, Putin's trauma and
how the world can be fixed (HM March 2022)
SITRAP 220627 and I marvel about Europe again 1830 there is a certain feel
about Europe as i stare through a window unto a suburban street. the Legoland
effect. what is this quietude that gives rest to my eyes? (HM Jun 2022)
SITRAP 220922 car crashes, loyalty and a tooth 1956 the almost endless saga
of giving new life to an old car, the question of intelligence and missing
teeth, the strange pleasure of watching cars crash and what (not) to do with
all the power we have (HM Sep 2022)
SITRAP 221204 Systems failure 1271 while the power is out in the town of Nieu
Bethesda, i refelct on how small triggers can cause major damage, simply because
things are interconnected (HM Dec 2022)
SITRAP
2023,4
SITRAP 230409 the women in Auschwitz 2198 of men and woman and the ranges
in between, the need to well distinguish between male and female and the atrocities
of men, the beauty of Bruges, sex change and those indomitable women of Auschwitz
(HM Apr 2023)
SITRAP 230605 DEURMEKAAR 1974 wirting from a McDonalds in Norway in a state
of confusion, thoughts on life and death and AI and the youth turns the concept
of "deurmekaar" into something rather central to the nature of things
(HM Jun 2023)
SITRAP 231202 England and a running television 1620 woken up by a running
television in the middle of a cold English night i recall various characters
i just recently met, the character of this big island and the question of
what is real and not real to a five year old (HM Nov 2023)
SITRAP 240320 CHANEL 1033 sitting in Dubai airport across from a Chanel shop
and amongst many people glued to their little screens thoughts wander around
techno manifestos, the fighting back body and real drops of sweat (HM Mar
2024)
SITRAP 240615 is life still created.. 1751 perhaps there is vertical evolution
going on that will save the day and then so much children's stuff to be sorted
out, a damaged friend, the dust of dying and evidently physical exercise is
good for you (HM Jun 2024)
07
RECORDINGS
Alledieberge
03:16 An elaborated instrumental version of a popular Afrikaans folk song,
"Al le die berge nog so blou" (HM Jan 2001)
life goes on 66:00:00 in the early days of recording with electronic sounds,
i created this series in honour of my "three dimensional analysis of
reality," falling out in nine parts (HM Jan 2000)
dressing up 04:54 It's so much easier to follow the gentle inflections of
the piano. You can dream, be silent and just listen. (HM May 2001 - description
Lara Kirsten)
Makana Postshow 03:37 A full-scale orchestral work summarising the gamut of
emotions and activity of the stage play "Makana" (the story of the
enigmatic 19th century Xhosa warrior) (HM May 2001)
You are the One 04:47 The piece was written for the 2001 Woman of the Year.
This is only the backing for the theme-song. Symphonic orchestra combined
with popular band. (HM Aug 2001)
a grand farewell 03:16 a rework of a 2001 recording: a cello duo on top of
sweeping synthesized strings, along a wave of resolute melancholy (HM May
2021)
did not know that i would grow up without parents 04:47 Collaborating track
with Andrew Peters, the notorious beggar and great musician (and friend) of
Grahamstown. This is my personal favourite. The story of his life as an orphan,
leaving him with deep and life-long scars. He died of HIV Aids. (Jul 2002)
Beautiful Land 03:28 An anthemic piece celebrating the natural beauty of South
Africa. Written for choir, with lyrics, it's been a HA!Man flagship piece
for many years (HM Aug 2002)
cello encore 06:26 Cello improvisation given as an encore at a house concert
(Lara Kirsten: virtuoso string crossings.Yearning passages reminiscent of
the romantic cello concerto repertoire). (HM Feb 2003)
hier is ons werklik vry 02:15 a live event improvisation (it is here that
we are truly free) - a song about being free in the land of your birth (HM
Mar 2003)
Mountain Top 05:06 from the album "Whistle Away" - one of my all-time
favourite recordings. recorded live and layered in the backyard of two friends,
Somerset Strand, night time (HM Mar 2003)
three part cello solo 06:22 solo cello improvisation from a live concert.
from melodious opening, to groove with voice, whistling, to bravura coda (HM
Dec 2003)
Klaas Voogd 07 05:26 sometimes a simple motive hits a nerve. a nerve that
displaces you to another realm. this was such a moment during an improvisational
journey on solo cello (HM Sept 2004)
cello encore 03:54 solo improvisation given as an encore - a strong conclusive
journey (HM Apr 2005)
song before sleep 03:05 simple chords with an african ring drift along the
piano. almost a-rhythmical. cello added (HM Nov 2005)
township feet 03:12 from the soundtrack for "foot fantasia" - a
lullaby-ish, contemplative take on an African groove (HM Oct 2007)
Stroll 06:37 One of the Xhosa song motives given to me by the late soprano
Nolufefe Mtshabe to rework in symphonic terms. This one strolls along gently,
builds climactically and eases back again. (with HM March 2008)
cello improv 080725 06:29 i received a neat applause for this one. some bravura
elements during a rather energetic dis-play. no idea where this was! (HM Jul
2008)
my oog jou snaar 45:56:00 epic soundtrack veering towards minimalistic styles
to accompany visuals of the landscape installation art works by Strijdom van
der Merwe (HM Sept 2010)
Kom Bly By My 02:16 from a live performance in Switzerland, a track from music
produced for an Afrikaans children's album ("come stay with me")
(HM Apr 2023)
in slowness 04:06 string accompaniment gently takes the violin along on a
serene path where occasionally whistling enters like a passing bird (HM and
Anton Cawthorne-Blazeby Aug 2014)
violin and piano finale 08:19 final improv duo between HA!Man and Anton Cawthorn-Blazeby
during a concert in Durban: romantic classical style flow into african joy!
(March 2017)
finale 04:04 childlike theme thrown into persistent build to consume multiple
layers of orchestral, elemental and primal sounds - fitting for a brilliant
finale (HM Jan 2018)
big 05:11 the big sounds, the big chords, the big moments. simply big. (HM
Dec 2020)
symphonic invocation at midnight 45:56:00 original soundtrack to accompany
land art visuals by Strijdom van der Merwe, used as backdrop for spontaneous
talking, as recorded in a car parked on a Belgian street (HM May 2022 from
Oct 2010)
SarieVariasie 05:05 From the third epic improvisation piano solo at Pino Guarraci's
Crescendo recording studio in Genk, Belgium. Playful and triumphant variations
on the theme of the South African folk song Sarie Marais. (HM Jul 2022)
late night phantasie 19:10 after a house concert with everyone having left,
i was left alone with the keyboard (piano & strings) still set up and
i let go of all that was not expressed (and contained) during the performance
(HM Oct 2022)
st johns recordings 15:30 a rare opportunity arose to record myself playing
on a rather good grand piano in the St Johns College Clarke Auditorium, Johannesburg.
three pieces ensued: "exploration", "dance" and "rest"
(HM Oct 2022)
voice of Mira at 5 09:43 not as intended, but the little Mira joined Veronika
Soreide and myself with this mainly adagio-type piece, microphone in hand
and soaring voice (Apr 2023)
08
SOUNDTRACKS
life goes on
66:00:00 in the early days of recording with electronic sounds, i created
this series in honour of my "three dimensional analysis of reality,"
falling out in nine parts (HM Jan 2000)
my oog jou snaar 45:56:00 epic soundtrack veering towards minimalistic styles
to accompany visuals of the landscape installation art works by Strijdom van
der Merwe (HM Sept 2010)
symphonic invocation at midnight 45:56:00 original soundtrack to accompany
land art visuals by Strijdom van der Merwe, used as backdrop for spontaneous
talking, as recorded in a car parked on a Belgian street (HM May 2022 from
Oct 2010)
st johns recordings 15:30 a rare opportunity arose to record myself playing
on a rather good grand piano in the St Johns College Clarke Auditorium, Johannesburg.
three pieces ensued: "exploration", "dance" and "rest"
(HM Oct 2022)
09
DRAWINGS
warrior spot
the warrior in this colourful intertwining of wannabe living forms (HM Nov
2003)
cosy peaceful lines, bright yellow dominating, the suggestion of a teddy being
tucked into a bed (HM Jun 2005)
stallation hand-drawn line figurines plotted communally around a rectangular
grid (HM Feb 2011)
landscape interlocking shapes and figures, coloured with an array of colours.
could also be an agricultural landscape as seen from above (HM Jun 2011)
grand plan this line evolvement can be looked at as being the expression of
one of those single-minded grand plans, trying to fit a world into one head.
usually rather weakly anchored.. (HM Jul 2013)
hearth black line drawing of disparate elements coming together in a kind
of hearth (HM Aug 2016)
let's take you home pencil drawing of a swan mother swimming with her two
little ones on her back (JD Sep 2022)
10
PHOTOGRAPHY
first los angeles
house concert (HM Oct 2004)
a teen age in Oudtshoorn young girl posing on a farm in the Klein Karoo (HM
Mar 2007)
with the people picture of a friend o fours in Paris, during a street protest,
talking to a fellow elderly person. he, a socialist in the true French tradition
(HM May 2016)
tomorrow i saw everything in Joke's face: the observer (Paris streets during
a protest), a sensitivity to looming crises, a deliberation as to what to
do and a resoluteness to do something (HM May 2016)
waiting treated photo of people waiting for a bus in front of a house, somewhere
in Belgium East (HM Aug 2016)
mother and child a quiet moment after a bath (HM Oct 2020)
11 SLIDE SHOWS
china
9 china - a few images of my only visit to China (Shanghai) that could
be saved from many that went lost through a hard drive crash. A tale of the
old and the new. (HM Apr 2007)
japan
driveby 20 various scenes taken from a cehicle driving through parts of
Japan near Osaka (HM April 2019)
a
canadian winter town 40 somewhere in remote Canada, a small town that
clearly suffers, but for that shows a lot of character (HM Oct 2019)
10
Days in Sharjah 50 50 impressions of our visit to the emirate of Sharjah,
having performed there at their first Fringe Festival (JD Jan 2020)
manhattan
walk 60 visual arrests the last time i was able to walk the streets of
Manhattan - on my way to the new World Trade Center building and back (HM
Nov 2016)
most
beautiful town 33 key places, buildings and views from my (and my parents')
past in Stellenbosch, described by some foreign visitors as the most beautiful
town in the world (HM Apr 2021)
Alexandria
67 the obscure town of Alexandria sits on the "Sunshine Coast"
route of the Eastern Cape. It has always drawn my eye. finally a moment to
take the lens on foot.. (May 2021)
Osaka
city 40 images of details mainly from the tourist section of Osaka where
America is much valorized. (HM Jan 2022 from Apr 2019)
Bushveld
Town 43 a visit paid to Raphuti, a typical impoverished black township.
in the shadow of hardship, there is yet much joy, closeness to nature and
inventiveness. and the camera agrees (HM Aug 2022 from Deb 2016)
Bethesda
relief 57 images of the town of Nieu Bethesda (in slight relief-haute),
known for its "Owl House". Somewhat isolated in the heart of the
Karoo, it retains an air of a different time where a deep tranquility reigns
(HM & JD Dec 2022)
12 VIDEOS
finale 04:36
a series of pictures sliding along the brilliant "finale" piece,
a celebration of people and places met and seen around the world, of life,
energy and gutso.. (HM Jan 2020)
a warm, warm reception 04:55 focusing on film material taken during a thank
you-reception by Primrose December in Khayelitsha, this video introduces her
organization, developing the youth in her community (HM & JD May 2020)
Singabanqobi Educare 06:00 video and photo impressions of a home made school
in Khayelitsha, striving to become registered as a state sposored school (HM
Jan 2023)
13 FILMS
Early HA!Man
Profile Project 12:54 Rozanne Stoman interviewed and filmed me in Knysna as
part of a university project (March 2004)
little steps of life 12:58 filming Mira from behind as she walks the Kologha
forest path, i remember a recurring dream i had as a child. i remember the
steps life took me on. (HM Aug 2020)